Wow! A lot of what is stated in this quote has happened, is happening! This year I’ve embarked on new adventures. Fitness & health being the biggest & quite honestly the scariest. I don’t know why either. I have no problem being honest about my sobriety & recovery, but when it comes to weight loss & exercise I clam up?! I’m still working on the why’s of that one!?? I started the year off with my heart broken (or so I thought). In retrospect, it was my expectations that caused the heartache. I have learned to go with flow & let affairs of the heart happen naturally, & guess what?! I am capable of doing that & I am quite content☺. M&M & I moved recently. It wasn’t a big move in terms of distance, but one that mentally & emotionally means a lot. We moved away & said goodbye to a place where a lot of shit went down. Fortunately little M is to young to recall, but his sister certainly does. It was definitely time to close the door on that chapter (not forget), of our lives. To be honest, a huge sigh of relief. The three of us are in a brand new place where we can make our own memories. That makes me happy☺.
Then I think about me. I like to say I’ve come a long way since starting this blog nearly 2 years ago!! WOW!!. I’ve been re-reading my first posts. It was definitely progress, not perfection☺. I was so freshly sober, so happy riding the infamous pink cloud, so spouting off anything and everything AA. And you know what?, that was OK. I was at a point where I was still struggling with the day to day recovery stuff. I wasn’t yet completely comfortable with my new normal. I still didn’t know what this ‘new’ Katie was all about. I still had a lot of resentments to let go off.
All that being said, I’m still not where I want to be today. I am striving each and everyday to be better. Not perfect, not searching for more of anything, just better than I was the day before. Just plain grateful, its that simple.
I think the biggest thing I have learned since starting this blog, is how important it is to be mindful. Everyday, & yes everyday I take 5 minutes to just be…. I clear my head, I pray, I say thank you, I think, I reflect, I journal, I breathe…anything where I focus on the inner me. Without these 5 minutes, the negative, nasty, scared Katie may rear her ugly head…& nobody, especially me wants that!
So I decided to attach my very 1st blog post. Once again its a great reminder of how far I have come, and how there is absolutely nothing I want more in this world than continue on this road of life; sober, healthy, happy road, & whatever surprises that are in store for me.