It’s time for a gratitude list. It is wayyyyyy over due. I’ve had a rough month or so. I guess in the game of life they are what I would call “first world problems”; but man I couldn’t catch a break. I was drowning in self pity and anxiety. I knew it was just a matter of time before my demon would sense my guard was down and attempt to take over my world and destroy all I have worked to become over the last 4 plus years. That’s the thing about addiction, it’s always on standby, ready to pounce, the moment I dont keep myself in check, it will attack.
I managed to wake up every morning after crying myself to sleep, and look in the mirror and say I have so much to be grateful for and had faith that things would get better… I had hope. (Still do).
Within the last 2 weeks some pretty amazing things have been happening in my life, and while I dont want to get into the details yet, I truly believe in Gods’plan for me. Forcing things to happen ain’t gonna work. Lord knows I have tried that multiple times in the past, and have not been successful at it.
If I just keep going one day at a time, keep the faith, and keep doing the next right thing, I’m gonna be ok….
So with out further ado. My gratitude list:
1. Sobriety: always my number 1! If I dont make it my 1st priority I can kiss my life goodbye.
2. M&M: the loves of my life, they are my everything. They make me want to work harder and be a better person. I am so proud to be their momma.
3. My mom: (she is tied with M&M). Cathy is my rock, my biggest supporter. She has never given up on me, even when I gave up on myself. Love you mom.
4. My job. It is my passion, even on the most frustrating of days. My hilarious co workers rock too! What happens in the infusion suite, stays in the infusion suite😉.
5. My sister Beth, hands down my biggest cheerleader. She has my back, I have hers.
6. My bestie Kerry. You know exactly how I feel about you.
7. Summer days and nights. Love the sunshine. The pool & beach. The heat. Ice cream. Driving in the car with the windows down, flip flops. Sundresses, bonfires, & smores.
8. Door Dash & grocery delivery.. ( always have to have a silly one). I mean, I never have to leave my house ever again, besides for work🤷♀️…life changing😉.
9. New friends.
10. New beginnings.
My story is far from over.